We don’t give lies the virtue they deserve. Afterall, a lie has a purpose, an agenda with
benefits. Truth does nothing more than exist. Lies and its many forms, deception,
misdirection, spin, propaganda, and manipulation predate civilization and permeate all
societies not just because they’re effective, but because they’re efficient. Consider them
a long lever that can turn a small amount of effort into a powerful force, a force that
takes much more effort to counteract than it does to create. An often-overlooked benefit
is that when lying to ourselves, they become natural and potent anti-depressants,
relieving anxiety and sadness alike.
The truth, by definition, cannot be manipulated and therefore is not a tool. Truth offers
no shortcuts and is frequently painful, boring, disappointing, embarrassing or requires
us to perform hard work. At its worst, the truth destroys relationships, bankrupts
businesses, rips into insecurities, ends careers, and convicts then condemns.
As righteous as a lie can be, it’ not without risk. It’s ironic that a lie’s greatest potential
benefit is to the audience it intends to deceive. If exposed, a lie reveals motives,
insecurities, vulnerabilities and sometimes even, virtues in a way that the truth cannot.
If the lie is an ancient, prevalent and powerful tool intended to benefit the teller, why are
we so susceptible to misdirection? Logic indicates that we should have evolved effective
strategies for detecting all types of manipulation. I believe we have those senses but
oftentimes ignore them when the stakes aren’t high. Perhaps it’s that the act of
exposing lies requires time and effort wisely spent elsewhere. Maybe it’s that
uncovering a lie risks conflict with little reward or that lies offer reinforcement to beliefs
we cling to for security. Perhaps when someone else’s lie benefits us, we do so without
the guilt or risk the liar assumes.
Internet communication, as modern and technologically influential as it is, follows the
same premise as our most ancient communications in that people always convey
information with a motive intended to benefit themselves. That’s not necessarily a bad
thing and it may simply be that this is who we are and how we work. Even selfish
communication often benefits the recipient too, but there’s always a motive, even if
benevolent. When motives are apparent, it’s much harder to hide un-truths. When
motives are hidden, the likelihood of deception increases. I become skeptical when
someone directly states their motive because that’s the ideal location for misdirection.
When someone not only states their motive but also attempts to persuade me that their
purpose is for my benefit to their detriment, every red flag I own goes up. I keep
listening, though, because if I’m able to resolve their deceit, I learn so much more than
the truth conveys.
With that said, I do find that most communications I receive are truthful, beneficial fibers
that connect the social web our civilization depends on. But what a boring life we would
experience if we were fed nothing but the truth.